Diary #3: Entering A New World Without An Abusive Partner

Woman crying

Today, I feel like a young adult entering an unknown world. My failed relationship taught me nothing but pain. As a believer in God, I often thought that this is apart of mission to go through in life. The abusive relationship I was stuck in for 8 years of my life saw me with no help from family members. My family refused to open their homes to me. Instead of providing me with protection from the father of my kids, my family blamed me for my ordeal. They questioned me in saying:

“What did you do? What did you do to upset him? If you didn’t upset him he would not have beaten you.”

Hearing my family’s words so ignorant of reality left me disappointed. This made me feel even more on my own than I already felt. For months and years I thought about how I am going to leave my crazy partner. When he drinks things get even worse…so I was praying also that he doesn’t drink liquor anymore.  The day he beat me up so badly that left me in a coma, and a badly swollen face was what prompted my mother and brother took me home with them. I spent many months in the hospital before going home. I suffered memory lost, and still to this day I have challenges remembering many things.

Ironically, it was that last beating that almost took my life that saved my life. Despite years of being beaten up by this man-my family never took me in. The day of reality, understanding and care from my family came as they saw me in the aftermath of the man who almost killed me. I resigned from my job, moved with my kids to a different location, and have a new life.

Surprisingly, my now ex-boyfriend is trying to make moves through family members trying to convince me he has not changed and wants me back. If there is one thing I have learned and that is- a bad man will never change.

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